Dear Connor, I sometimes sit and wonder just how different life would be if the Gods had made you the “standard” of what a young man should be. I wonder if you’d be out all day, playing with your friends. Or chatting up the girls and driving our Mum round the bend! Would you have … Continued
For as long as I can remember, I have been close to my sisters. I’m the youngest of three – it feels like having two best friends who will always look out for me. I was drawn to Sibs because one of my sisters, Joanna, has autism and a learning disability. When Joanna and I … Continued
Guilt…. It’s a feeling defined in the dictionary as ‘the fact of having committed a specified or implied offence or crime’ or ‘making someone feel guilty in order to induce them to do something.’ One of these definitions resonates more with siblings than the other, but where does the guilt from come? Does it come … Continued
An extract from “The Sibling” by Jools Abrams You can support Jools’ kickstarter campaign to publish the book here. Epilogue: Blackpool It is the first day of October, two days shy of my brother’s fifty second birthday, when we find ourselves on holiday again, the first without our parents, and the first time we are … Continued
I’m the only family member for my brother aged 52 with Asperger’s and my mother, aged 88, who has dementia. So, if I can’t see anything about my relationship with my brother as a positive, how do I, as a great believer in the life-changing effects of focusing on positives, find a positive in having … Continued
“The siblings of special needs children are quite special. Absolutely accepting and totally loving, from birth. Someone who is different mentally, and has a different way of seeing the world, is a wonderful trait. It’s a trait I wish there was another way of getting, but there isn’t. And it does involve a degree of … Continued
A sibling relationship is one of the most unique familial relationships out there. It usually outlives any other kind of familial relationship, meaning the impact it can have in shaping an individual’s life can be huge. When you add disability to this, the relationship becomes even more formative, for both parties. I grew up with … Continued
My employer was supportive when I told them I was a carer and, given that my team had all been working remotely from home anyway due to the pandemic, there were no work issues with me working from my mum’s house. I was able to flex my working hours to suit me, so that I … Continued
My brother, Mark, has periventricular leukomalacia which is a lifelong disability caused by damage to his brain around the time of his birth. This has impacted him physically, cognitively and made him partially sighted. He has always lived in boarding schools or supported living due to the level of his needs, including challenging behaviour. Mark … Continued
My youngest brother Reuben, who has Down’s Syndrome, suffered a breakdown 4 years ago. It was a form of regression that locked him into himself. After two years of moving between my parents and partner´s homes, as we were trying to get him better, he moved into a care home in Dorset, UK. Then the … Continued