Many parents of a child who is disabled, has special educational needs or a serious long-term condition find that their own ambitions and dreams have had to go on hold as their lives have been changed dramatically. Siblings also find that the things they really want to do are difficult, if not impossible, in their family situation. However, while siblings are still children they deserve to be able to look forward to doing exciting things in the future.
Here are two great ways to let a sibling know that that it is good to pursue your dreams:
- The most important thing you can do is be a role model for your child. What would you really like to do for yourself? Maybe you once wanted to be really good at something or you had a hobby you loved. How can you still do some of that thing, even though life is very busy? Can you go to an evening class or spend some time on it at home? When children see their parents doing things they want to achieve, it gives them the message that it is OK to do things for yourself and to achieve things for yourself. Tell your child about the things you would like to do and what you are doing to achieve them.
- Ask your child about their dreams and ambitions. What would they like to do or be in the future? Talk about what they may need to learn or practice in order to do that thing. What can you do to help your child follow something that they’re interested in? Even if it’s a small action to start with, it lets them know that what they want matters and is worth spending time on.
Siblings often grow up putting their own needs last. You can give them the message that it’s OK to think about yourself sometimes too!