My brother Richard is two years younger than me, and has severe physical and learning disabilities. He presents as if he has Cri du chat syndrome, but he is much more aggressive and hyperactive with significant behavioural difficulties. He can’t talk, he needs 24 hour care and he has a lot of health problems associated … Continued
Guilt…. It’s a feeling defined in the dictionary as ‘the fact of having committed a specified or implied offence or crime’ or ‘making someone feel guilty in order to induce them to do something.’ One of these definitions resonates more with siblings than the other, but where does the guilt from come? Does it come … Continued
When my now husband and I first met, we were practically babies. We were both 20 years old (over 40 years ago) and caught up in the excitement of a special kind of intense love for one another, a powerful draw that was palpable. At the time, we both lived away from our homes, having … Continued
In this video, adult sibling Kausar shares her experiences of growing up in a large family, caring for her two brothers who have learning disabilities, alongside juggling work and raising her own family. She reflects on the loss of her father and how her own death will impact her brothers too. This video is available … Continued
An extract from “The Sibling” by Jools Abrams (currently out on submission) Epilogue: Blackpool It is the first day of October, two days shy of my brother’s fifty second birthday, when we find ourselves on holiday again, the first without our parents, and the first time we are sharing a room since childhood. We are … Continued
I met my partner at my local library where we were both volunteering over the summer. Three months previously, I had split with my ex-girlfriend and quit a teaching job that was impacting my mental health – I was definitely not looking for a relationship! He struck me instantly as a kind, genuine person and … Continued
These are a few paintings I have done of my brother who has autism. Artwork by Poppy Scoffings. https://poppyscoffings.com/
I’m the only family member for my brother aged 52 with Asperger’s and my mother, aged 88, who has dementia. So, if I can’t see anything about my relationship with my brother as a positive, how do I, as a great believer in the life-changing effects of focusing on positives, find a positive in having … Continued
The (very) least I can do? It’s funny isn’t it. When you’re a kid. The bullying and harsh words that get thrown at you for being different. They really stick with you. The effects ringing round your brain decades later. You don’t need to be a sibling to know that. Just someone who stands out. … Continued
“The siblings of special needs children are quite special. Absolutely accepting and totally loving, from birth. Someone who is different mentally, and has a different way of seeing the world, is a wonderful trait. It’s a trait I wish there was another way of getting, but there isn’t. And it does involve a degree of … Continued